I took my stem out to replace the rubber at the end and now its as if the seat grew. If I put the stem in all the way it won't move. Lots of pictures

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INFO: So my family moved into this 1970s era mobile home in 2012 when I was a kid. In maybe 2018 or around there our shower head was leaking so my dad (who worked with cars for a living) taught me how to removed the stem, replace the rubber at the bottom of the stem, and rotate it back in with a pipe wrench. In 2022 my dad despite being only mid 40s started getting strokes and ultimately died in september 2023. My mom took her own life in August this year to avoid living a year without my dad. Sucks.

Earlier this year while my mom was still alive the shower started leaking again. I followed what my dad taught me; I took out the stem, replaced the rubber part at the end and screwed it back in with no issues. Fixed it with no issues or leaks.

Their bathroom (the trailer has 2 one for their bedroom and the main one) didn't have anyone using since August (aside from occasions where my brother was in the main or vice versa). I recently had one of these rare occasions and notice a leaking bathtub faucet. I have no idea how long this was a problem for but our water bill wasnt affected its been the same for years now. I still thought to myself that its wasteful and since i fixed it earlier this year that it should be a breeze to fix and would feel good to do something my dad taught me. this ended up being a horrible mistake.

So i took out the stem pretty easy and replaced the rubber stopper no issues (it was worn down again). When i went to put the stem in the pipe it was giving problems tightening. I got it to tighten back down by rolling the attaching nut so that the shower handle was all the way open but that lead to the issue where i couldnt open or close the shower handle anymore since it was fully extended to be locked in. It was almost as if the seat for it had grew. here's the video to explain what i just said (please ignore the dirty background i took this video before i cleaned the area to take the rest of videos/pictures later in the post)

Since water started leaking from the stem now too i thought my manual manipulation of the locking ring mustve ruined something. I tried replacing the orings on the stem itself but i think it i made it worse since it started leaking worse from the stem. I decided to cut my loses and went to the plumbing supply store and got a very similar if not the same stem (the desk person said it was a match). 11-8053 for American Brass

(unfortunatley the screw for the handle/knob is stripped so i cant fully verify it but seems simlarlly tall and the plumbing supply person told me they both have the rare old style smooth all around except for 2 flat parts style that modern showers dont have )

I bought the stem and installed it, same issue. water was leaking from the stem connection and the shower head and the stem wouldnt open/close once connected properly. Almost as if the seat grew randomly. i called the plumbing supply to ask for their advice and they said i should try and replace the seat. so i went back bought the seat removal tool came home and took the seat out but first i took a picture to see what end of the tool i needed and after i took out the seat an oring came with it https://imgur.com/sqxeEF8. and after i cleaned out the remnants of the oring this is how the inside of the "pipe"? looked https://imgur.com/Q2YFagc **I think this is wear my first problem may lie, i took an oring out but i didnt put one back in**

At the time i didnt think much of the oring situation i carried the old seat https://imgur.com/c1VTIv3 to the plumbing store and they said it was badly worn and uneven at the end which was cutting into the washers. they matched to a new seat that i forgot to take a picture of but according to the receipt it was a 138 bibb seat bag and from googling i found an image and dimensions https://imgur.com/6fbF8Aj

The new seat was a little longer than my old seat but the plumbing supply people said that was the best they had and its the right part.

I installed the new seat with the blue joint compond on the threads. I tightened it in the pipe as far as it would go and even over tighted to the point of the tool having brass shavings on it when i took it out. This is how it looks now https://imgur.com/f4lilYB

I went to install the new seat with the new stem that were verified by the plumbing store to match so theoretically everything shouldve matched but it was too long for the pipe. in fact way too long to the point where it couldnt even tighten down https://imgur.com/xo4tZc0 https://youtube.com/shorts/wjo143uduv0?feature=share

As expected water leaked again from the stem, the shower, and the tub https://youtube.com/shorts/-La2zmoRH3I?feature=share

So now my problem went from minuscule wasting of water to now i have to lock off the main and turn it back on whenever me or my brother needs to use our bathroom or shower and then lock it off. Its incredibly inconvenient and going out in the cold right after a shower to lock off the main sucks. I shouldve just left it alone but i dont have a time machine

so now i need to fix my issue. the first things that comes to mind in terms of fixing this is asking you guys why would the seat just grow out of nowhere. when i first took the old stem out and replaced the rubber on the end it wouldnt lock back into place nor would the new stem. obviously metal cant grow overnight so maybe if i got to the bottom of that i can figure out how to fix it. This is how much the old stem goes into the pipe now to reach the seat https://imgur.com/L9Bkeln https://imgur.com/aI8Gq6c

the second thing i need to ask you guys is that since my old seat was surrounded by a washer does my new seat need to be as well? and if so how would i figure out what size and how to place it? last thing id want is to stick something in there that cant come out.


and my final question to you guys is the only solution i could think of: is it possible to by a shorter seat and/or cut my old seat to give my stem more clearance inside the pipe? theoretically if the seat was smaller i could lock the nut into the pipe and still spin the handle in and out to meet the new seat.

and the long shot, by viewing the inside of my pipe without a seat https://imgur.com/6EJuT1m do you think its possible for me to buy a new seat and new stem to fit my pipe?

Ive been dealing with this for a few days now and its got me super stressed out. I honestly woudlve called a plumber by now but the trailer is a total mess especially my parents room where my mom did what she did. Me and my brother was planning to clean it for the new year but we might have to clean it sooner so we can get a plumber to come and try to fix but its days upon days of cleaning needed and its trauma i dont want to relive right now. id love to be able to fix this and be able to use the water in our trailer again but i just cant by myself with my knowledge so i hope you guys can help me.

i took a lot of pictures and videos of various things throughout the process and tried to put them where best fit but if any more are needed please don't hesitate to ask.
 
I didn’t read your post but your seat is chewed up. Replace the seat and start from there.
 
Sounds like youve dealt with lots of crap lately. My condolences to you.
Your seat is right hear. You can pick up a seat removal tool pretty cheap.

Unscrew counter clockwise, then match it up. Then replace with a bit of paste, then add a rebuilt stem.
 

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most of us have been in incredibly bad hoarder houses. don't worry about being embarrassed, some plumber will be willing to brave it.
 
I didn’t read your post but your seat is chewed up. Replace the seat and start from there.
I replaced the seat and the stem but for some reason its as if the seat grew and it no longer fits. once the seat is there the stem won't close in all the way and if i force it there's no more threads for it to open and close on the handle.
 
Buy a flat washer/ Bibb screw kit seat removal tool kit see if you can salvage the old stem
i have the seat removal tool and the old stem in my hand but i think my messing with the old stem ruined it. both stems aren't closing in all the way but the old stem leaks badly from the connection where as the new stem just drips.
 
Sounds like youve dealt with lots of crap lately. My condolences to you.
Your seat is right hear. You can pick up a seat removal tool pretty cheap.

Unscrew counter clockwise, then match it up. Then replace with a bit of paste, then add a rebuilt stem.
thanks for the kind words. i replaced the seat but its still the same issue. the stems aren't closing in good. the old seat, probably because its marginally smaller, leaks less than the new seat. right now i have the old seat with the new stem but it still isn't closing.

something i also want to ask is that my old seat had an oring around it. but i didnt replace it when installing the new seat/reinstalling the old one . could this be a point of concern?
 
most of us have been in incredibly bad hoarder houses. don't worry about being embarrassed, some plumber will be willing to brave it.
thanks i might have to end up going with someone because i dont know why none of my solutions are working
 
I replaced the seat and the stem but for some reason its as if the seat grew and it no longer fits. once the seat is there the stem won't close in all the way and if i force it there's no more threads for it to open and close on the handle.
Take the parts out of the faucet and compare them to the old parts you removed. See what f they’re different. If they are then you have the wrong seat or the wrong stem, possibly both.
 
Take the parts out of the faucet and compare them to the old parts you removed. See what f they’re different. If they are then you have the wrong seat or the wrong stem, possibly both.
they look the same to me, minus some millimeters on the seat. i took both to the plumbing supply store and they were the ones who matched it up. this makes no sense to me why the correct seat and stem arent working

Here's my seats with a measuring tape

Here's my stems

This is how much my stem goes in with the seat

This is how the inside of the pipe looks without the seat
 
If they’re the same and it’s not working then it never worked before. You realize that’s the only logical/ reasonable answer.

Personally I’d cut the seat down and polish it smooth…..it has to be cut perfectly straight. I use a copper tubing cutter and then fine sand paper to roll the cut edge to make it round and smooth.

Or

You can go back to plumbing supply and get a shorter seat with the same diameter and thread pattern.
 
If they’re the same and it’s not working then it never worked before. You realize that’s the only logical/ reasonable answer.

Personally I’d cut the seat down and polish it smooth…..it has to be cut perfectly straight. I use a copper tubing cutter and then fine sand paper to roll the cut edge to make it round and smooth.

Or

You can go back to plumbing supply and get a shorter seat with the same diameter and thread pattern.
yeah i have no idea why its not lining up. something seriously strange is going on here. do you know/think it has to do with the missing o-ring around the seat? when i review my pictures i can see there was one there before and now there's not one.
 
yeah i have no idea why its not lining up. something seriously strange is going on here. do you know/think it has to do with the missing o-ring around the seat? when i review my pictures i can see there was one there before and now there's not one.
I’ve never seen a seat with an oring. I do not believe it belonged on the seat and I don’t think that ls your problem.

Based off the info given it appears the wrong parts were in your valve. The parts can’t be “ the same “ if the new stem won’t fit in the valve and operate if the old stem operated.

Looks like the seat is too long. Seats are often sold in different lengths to accommodate various faucets.
 
I te read the beginning of your post you said you replaced the rubber stopper I'm assuming you mean the flat rubber washers screwed into the stem,the washers come in different thicknesses,the new one has to be the same, did you remove the other seat and stem and compare??????
 

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